… Oh, Baby, You Should Go and Love Yourself

self-love

/ˈˌself ˈləv/

noun

regard for one’s own well-being and happiness (chiefly considered as a desirable rather than narcissistic characteristic).

In 1956, psychologist Erich Fromm proposed that loving oneself was different from being arrogant, conceited, or egocentric, rather, it meant that you cared about yourself and you took responsibility for yourself.

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But what does “self love” really mean? Put yourself in another’s person’s shoes and imagine if you were them how you’d treat you on a daily basis? Are you good to yourself? Kind to yourself? The answer is tricky and I’ll be the first to admit sometimes I’m not the nicest when it comes to my feelings on me.

  • I’ve beaten myself up on decisions I’ve made.
  • I’ve made harsh negative comments about my body and how I look.
  • I’ve set myself up for failure with unrealistic expectations.

I’ve participated in all of these behaviors that have wreaked havoc on my mental health, my physical health, and my relationship not once but multiple times.

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Instead what I (we) need to start doing is:

  • Be gentle when it comes to my imperfections.
  • Understand that I’m a work in progress
  • Keep my self-talk positive.
  • Accept myself for the good, the bad, and the ugly.
  • Own my inner beauty and not just focus on what’s on the outside.

We need to fully accept and love ourselves because we are ALWAYS worthy of the good in the world. The old adage still stands true – if we don’t invest in ourselves, then nobody else will. So, on this day – February 15th, the day after Valentine’s Day, the day AFTER we’ve shown our loved ones how much we care, let’s show them the true meaning of love by cherishing OUR wonderfully imperfect selves and loving ourselves for the perfectly imperfect people that we are.

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